Man : Where Is The Love (Hatred)

Hatred

Hatred (or hate) is a deep and emotional extreme dislike against individuals, entities, objects or ideas. Hatred is the feelings of anger  and towards hostility. The Morale Rule, oppose the universal hatred towards another.

The term "hate" is loosely used, from to hate vegetables  in the early life, to teenagers undying hatred of the parents who refuse to extend curfew by a half hour. These scenarios are more a strong dislike of the situation. History is proof of the true hatred being practiced . Religious and political wars have claimed the lives of millions and innocent people have been killed for no greater reason than they were different in socially unacceptable ways.

Psychoanalytic views

 

Sigmund Freud defined hate as an ego state that wishes to destroy the source of its unhappiness. Penguin Dictionary of Psychology defines hate as a "deep, enduring, intense emotion expressing animosity, anger, and hostility towards a person, group, or object." Because hatred is believed to be long-lasting, many psychologists consider it to be more of an attitude or disposition than a temporary emotional state.

The common cause in most acts of hatred is fear,  usually fear of different types of people or ideas. This is why hatred is most often directed toward people of differing race, sexual orientation, religious background or some other criterion. People are threatened by the unknown and seek to extinguish this fear, resulting historically in massive death tolls, slavery  and other injustices.

Types of Hate

Hatred is often blind, making human beings to believe things that simply are not true. This cause  in feelings of animosity and prejudice with little or nothing to back it up. 
This blind hatred often has to do with : 
a. race, 
b. religion, 
c. gender, 
d. politics or 
e. sexual orientation. 
As such, it has wreaked havoc on the world for centuries and will probably continue to do so for many more. 
Some examples of the different ways hatred manifests itself:

a. Racism

     Racism is characterized by racial prejudice or discrimination. Merriam-Webster defines as "an irrational attitude of hostility directed toward an individual, a group, a race or their supposed characteristics." This hostility has been over the years to leading to error onus in human judgment: slave trade, racial profilling  and countless hate crimes. 
     Hatred is a learned emotion, and that racism is also learned, rather than innate. Adopting the "us vs. them" theory, human were being territorial, rather than. Many psychologists believe that, although people do classify others based on race, they are more likely to mentally classify them based on age and gender. 

b.  Hatred based on religion and politics:

      History proofs that humans don't require differing skin colors to find fault with each other, simply look to the many religious and political wars that have occurred. Protestants and Catholics, members promoting  peace and love in beliefs, have fought bloody wars. Terrorist attacks are almost always related to political arguments, religious disagreements or both. Religious and politically motivated atrocities have traditionally been inspired by greed, envy and fear

c.   Homophobic or hate based on sexual orientation:
      The decision to come out of the closet is usually a very difficult one that is not made easier by rampant homophobia that persists in today's society. According to the American Psychological Association homosexuality and bisexuality are often subject to social stigmas such as prejudice, violence and discrimination.

d.    Self Hate
       Despite major advances in psychological counseling and treatment, self-hatred remains a problem for many people around the world. Suicide is the result of these feelings of self-hatred and despair which can be caused by mental illness, as well as social and environmental factors like sexual or substance abuse. Teens are especially at risk of suicide. According to the American Psychological Association (APA), suicide is the third most common cause of death for people between the ages of 15 and 24 years old.

 e.  Hate of the disable

Getting  so bad that some people even hate their own children, especially those who were born disabled. There are people who cannot stand to be in the same room as a disabled person and some will even go as far as to commit crimes against them. It just goes to show that hate is another of the illogical emotions that humans should steer clear of.

 

Causes

        i.      Instinctive Survival Behavior

    An instinctive behavior traits in humans: survival trait of competition. When food is scarce, animals will fight to get it for themselves and their offspring. People are no different, seen in the scrambling for food during a famine. Governments have institutionalized this instinct as wars and colonization, trying to outlast other governments through the acquisition of land and resources, and defending what you have.

      ii.      Defensive

    A defense mechanism. Animals lash out when they are harmed. When one is being physically harmed or merely inconvenienced, repressed, or simply looked down on, the response may be the same. Human intelligence perceives hostility, arrogance, or superior authority to be harmful, and only the rules of societies teach us to accept these situations.

    iii.      Paranoia

     The human negative capacity for imagination, and suspicion, and delusion, can create enemies even where there are none. Paranoia and xenophobia can instill hatred and hostility even where no competition, no one harming you, or  no ill will. Humans maintain enmity, and feuds, and national rivalries, even where it has not existed in their lifetimes.

Fortunately, humans also have the rational ability to understand what motivates them, and to establish good will, and peace, and understanding, and to promote these ideals, even among those who do not initially accept them.

Hate Crime

American Psychological Association (APA) defined hate crime as "violent acts against people, property or organizations because of the group to which they belong or identify with, hate crimes (also known as bias crimes) are all too common today.

A hate crime (also known as a "bias-motivated crime") generally refers to criminal acts motivated by hate.
The hate crimes target victims are usually defined by

race, 

gender, 

religion, 

sexual orientation, 

disability, 

class,

ethnicity, 

nationality,

age,

gender identity, or 

political affiliation.

Incidents may involve 

destruction of property, 

bullying, 

harassment,

verbal abuse or insults, or

offensive graffiti or letters (hate mail).

Hate speech is speech perceived to disparage a person or group of people based on their social or ethnic group, such as race, sex, age, ethnicity, nationality, religion, sexual orientation, gender identity, disability, language ability, ideology, social class, occupation, appearance (height, weight, skin color, etc.), mental capacity, and any other distinction that might be considered by some as a liability.

In USA, the FBI in  2006 saw an 8 percent increase in hate crimes nationwide from 2005. Nearly 8,000 hate crimes were committed in 2006 and ranked in this order in terms of numbers: anti-black (2,640), anti-Jewish (967), anti-white (890), anti-male homosexual (747), anti-Hispanic (576), anti-Islamic (156) and anti-female homosexual (163).

Bullying of Hate       

Hate exists and  nourished in the society and social values. Without the ethical and humanitarians concerns in  moral, societal and educational practice, hate will take place. Movements such  as Nazism, Soviet communism, Ordinary bullies, dictatorships,  fanatic religious groups or ordinary street gangs seek total domination and control..

Bullying and international terrorist groups have similarities. Discriminating  victims, advocating them as different or dangerous, is part and parcel of targeting victims of bullying and terrorist activities. A social authoritarian structure relies on the  weapons of bullies. Bullies seek power, their victims are seen as easy prey, and they are the means to the bully's purpose, the achievement of power. Every year hundreds of humans are victims of hate crimes. Teenagers and young adults account for a significant proportion of the country's hate crimes…both as perpetrators and victims.

If children are taught what to think, rather than how to think, they are easily manipulated and more likely to do something to please someone else rather than do what is good for them or help someone else. The reality for thousands of repressed children is a life filled with fear, hatred, violence and bloodshed. Terrorist groups view children and youth as convenient recruits for suicide bombing missions.

Consequences
The devastating consequences that hate has on you personally.  Remember that hate is a double edged sword and it is sharp both ways. If someone hurts you or you simply hate them, the consequences of hating them are not worth it. Your best option would be to ignore them and be indifferent.

         i.        Hate can cause you to lose focus on the direction of your own life and make you obsessed with this one person, thing or group of people.

       ii.         You may be forced to stay away from people you love simply because you can not be in the same place as this person.

      iii.        Hate is toxic and it ends up contaminating your entire being and soon you will start to hate not only that one person but also anyone and anything that reminds you of them

Overcoming Hate
Overcoming hateful feelings takes work and patience.

·         Identifying Causes

To rid yourself of a hateful heart try and find out the real reason why you hate something or someone. Knowing the cause will help you know if the hatred is worthwhile or not. For example, if you generally hate all men because you had an abusive uncle, father or teacher, it may be good for you to know that not all men are the same and that some men are actually good people. Instead of dismissing all men, get a chance to know a few and if you find that they behave the same then go ahead and hate but do not make a rash decision.

·         Avoidance
Avoid for those who we cannot stop to hate. ‘Out of sight is out of mind’. Then there are those who we cannot successfully avoid such as family members and work mates. For these, try a new tactic.

     Instead of showing clear and unmistakable hatred and anger, try appearing pleasant and polite, calm and collected, or simply shut your mouth and paste a smile on your face. This will force them to change their behavior towards you and you may be surprised. You may find that they were simply reacting to you and not intentionally trying to harm you.

Resolve

     Resolve the conflict when possible. If hate is based on a long-standing disagreement, perhaps now is a good time to bury the hatchet. This may be exceedingly awkward and uncomfortable, but may help put the past behind you. If the conflict cannot be resolved in this way, for example, if the object of hatred is a political party or ethnic group, work towards examining your own belief system as a way of overcoming this hatred.

Forgiving

         Work towards forgiving someone for the harm they have done. "Forgiveness doesn't mean that you deny the other person's responsibility for hurting you, and it doesn't minimize or justify the wrong." says Mayo Clinic staff chaplain, Katherine Piderman, Ph.D., "You can forgive the person without excusing the act. Forgiveness brings a kind of peace that helps you go on with life."

Guidance

        Seek psychological, spiritual or community guidance if necessary. Talking with people who have either been through your situation or are in a place to listen objectively can be of great importance when working to move past hatred. This allows for an opportunity to speak freely, without being judged and can offer a different perspective as well as tools for helping to replace hate with a less destructive emotion.

Loving

         Replace hateful thoughts with loving ones. Coretta Scott King, widow of Martin Luther King Jr., said, "Hate is too great a burden to bear. It hurts the hater more than it injures the hated." These words suggest that when we hate, a part of us loses the ability to find love and forgiveness, ultimately hurting ourselves. Some suggest that praying for the well being of someone we have hateful feelings for is a way to shift thoughts of hate to love, or at least acceptance. This may be seemed impossible at times, but working on developing a new response to the object of your hatred will start the process

Take it Easy

Take it easy on yourself. This process may take some time, particularly if the damage done to you or the person aggrieved. Understand that everyone goes through these challenges at some point in their lives and have to find their own paths towards working through these feelings.

This is easier said than done and anyone who hates as a result of some form of abuse is in even more pain than others. Their hatred is justified and if they intend to take revenge, it is what keeps them focused on that goal. It has been said ‘To fight well, it is necessary to hate’.

However, it is good to remember that the more you hate this person the more they stay in your life, if you try to put them out of your life and mind then they can no longer torment you. Forgive them if you can, for what they did may be unforgivable, simply ignore them and move on with your life, be successful and let go.

Excerpt  with thanks from :

Nikki Jardin, eHow Contributor

http://www.victimsupport.org.uk

Wikipedia

Sally M. Rogow - April 2003

http://tlc.howstuffworks.com